The Flickering Flame: A Reflection on Judaism Today
Chanukah 2024
I’ve found myself in an unexpected circumstance, one in which Jewish people want to share their Judaism with me. At work, charity events, dinner parties, coffee catchups, and in my DMs, people feel compelled to discuss their feelings about Antisemitism, Israel, their family’s survival stories, or how they confidently express their identity.
I call it unexpected because I don’t work in the Jewish professional world. I don’t work for a Jewish organization, school, synagogue, or non-profit. I don’t wear a kippah to work or in most professional settings. Yet, people have realized I am visibly Jewish.
Understandably, these conversations have multiplied and intensified since 10/7. People used to share their favorite deli, now they discuss raising their kids.
Truthfully, “circumstance” isn’t the right word. In fact, it’s a privilege and one I don’t take lightly.
Last night, after everyone quieted and presents were put away, I sneaked a final glance at the dwindling menorah on our windowsill. Watching the shamash flicker, I thought of the many Jews I’ve met and spoken to over the last year.
The Talmud’s Shabbat tractate recounts the debate between Houses Shammai and Hillel on lighting Chanukah candles. Shammai advocates lighting eight candles on the first night, seven on the second, decreasing to one on the last. Hillel suggests starting with one candle, increasing to eight on the last night (the approach we follow).
The Talmud’s sages debate the reasoning (Shabbat 21b), but perhaps there is a lesson here for us . It is hard to tell if a small fire is just getting started or starting to fade, and I think this may be at the crux of the argument between Shammai and Hillel. Many of the people I encounter, who want to discuss their Judaism, also don’t know if this small fire in them is just getting started or starting to fade.
Is their exhaustion, fear and anger going to cause their flame to slowly dim or is it a spark that is going to continue to glow and brighten? Perhaps this is what Hillel was picking up on. When one views that single flickering shamash the task of lighting all 8 candles seems insurmountable. How will I go from family Chanukah parties to lighting all 8 nights to lighting shabbat candles to raising my family to light Chanukah and Shabbat candles.
One of the most comforting and incredible aspects of Judaism is that we know with confidence that our ancestors lit their Chanukah candles in times of great distress and danger, and yet we still do it today. No one, internally or externally, decided to extinguish the flame once and for all.
On Chanukah the ancient Greeks tried to destroy Judaism not Jews, and we celebrate that by publicly displaying our Judaism. We light a candle (or 8) in our window and confidently announce to the world that we will persist. We will study our traditions, keep them dear and pass them on to our future generations. We will take the flickering sparks inside of us and kindle them into a vast flame that won’t diminish.
